Itâ€™s never an easy thing to be mistreated by the person you thought you would share your entire world with. I was in a loving relationship (or so I thought) for 5 and a half years with my partner. We met during our last year of high school, after he had transferred from his old school because his parents had moved to Melbourne from Queensland. We didnâ€™t have that instant connection as I was far too busy trying to get my grades close to perfect before end of year exams. It was that time of year when the pressure was felt during each assessment. I simply had no time or interest to meet any boys, and I was definitely happy that way for the time being.
I was always an introvert as I kept to myself since a very young age. I actually still am quite reserved and mind my own business, but it was time to share my negative experiences which I had chosen to blind myself towards for many years. Constantly living in denial, making excuses for actions and blaming myself for the outcomes that were disgusting and degrading. No one deserves to be treated the way I was treated. I am writing my thoughts and story in hopes that it will inspire and encourage other victims of domestic abuse to come forward and stop the silence.
It all starts with you. The way you see yourself, the way others make you see yourself and the person you would ideally like to be. But you see, by the time I had come to this realisation many years had gone by and my confidence and self esteem had taken extreme hits to the point where I had none left at all. My self perception had no positive aspects to it. I had begun to believe the constant insults and offensive remarks that were coming my way on a daily basis. During my final year of high school, we had eased into a friendship which I really enjoyed. It came to be an increasing interest that left me looking forward to the moment I would finally get to see him each morning. The usual things were happening, he was asking me out on dates and I would make time to be able to see him. Things were great and we were what they call â€œofficialâ€ by the time formal time had come around. Everything was great. He was treating me better than what I could have ever hoped for and he was definitely proving my perception of boys and relationships to be completely wrong.
After high school, he went on to do his apprenticeship in building and I had finally gotten the offer I had always dreamt of; to study music at a renowned university. It was in my first year of university that things were beginning to get strained. It only went downhill from there. He started with his rude remarks about my grades and that I would never amount to anything. Even though these comments were shocking to hear as I had never heard him say anything negative about me, I decided to sweep it under the rug. That was when the arguments started as a result of me having so much resentment towards him. It was a classic tale of verbal abuse. He would insult me for anything I did, then he would apologise and tell me he would never do anything again. It was beginning to turn into a vicious cycle that I could not seem to get myself out of. I was miserable in my own private world, and would never dare to tell or show it to friends or family. I had tried to leave him on several occasions, but this did not go down well at all and he began to verbally abuse me telling me no one else would ever be with me and he would blackmail me which made me feel like I was worthless with no options at all. My marks at university were suffering to the point where I had lost my place in the course and therefore was forced to let go of my dreams. It was secretly eating me up, until that one day everything changed.
I was invited to a work function and was told that I could bring a partner. I asked whether he would like to join me, that was when it all started. He began to tell me that my work did not mean anything, and that I was delusional for thinking he would join me. This really angered me and I told him that he was not forced to come along and that he had no right to belittle my every move. As I began to make my way out of the room, he grabbed my arm and struck me against the wall. I was in complete and utter shock, then things went from bad to worse. I received several blows to my face and chest, then he began to punch my stomach. I was completely defenseless and helpless to the point where I could no longer make any noises or cry for help. He continued for what felt like forever, and coldly left me on the floor writhing in pain. After a few hours, I was able to get myself cleaned up and took a shower for several minutes. As desperately as I wanted to drive to my parents house, I decided not to as they would then find out what happened to me. I was too ashamed to ask for help. I locked myself in my room to make sure he could not get to me if he came home later that night.
Suddenly the doorbell rang, and I began to shake from fear. I did not have the courage to answer it, but the doorbell rang and rang. One of my closest friends texted me letting me know she was at the door. Relieved, I made my way over and opened the door. She instantly knew something was wrong and told me she had seen my partner rage down the street as she was making her way over here. I simply could not hold back any more secrets so I started to cry and tell her exactly what happened. She was absolutely furious at him. What I found most puzzling was that she was also mad at me for not speaking up and telling anyone she needed help. After explaining my feelings of shame and embarrassment, she understood me and told me the path I should be taking for this to stop. Afterall, no one deserves to go through domestic abuse both verbally and physically.
We drove to her place that night after she helped me pack my things and told me we needed to get professional help and guidance. She herself had grown up in a violent home environment, so she was getting more furious as time went on. Her mother made us some hot drinks and told me about her own personal experience with her abusive husband. She told me it was critical to get help and justice so I never have to go through anything of the kind again, which is why she told me about Crime Victims Lawyers.
They specialise in processing your domestic abuse claims to receive the compensation that you deserve. This was the organisation that my friendâ€™s mother had got her victims of crime compensation claim processed with, with the lawyers acting on her behalf helping her immensely to get the justice she needed and wanted after her situation. We contacted them the next morning and they were great. They helped me to explain the situation calmly to get as much accurate information as possible to put forward my case in a strong manner. Crime Victims Lawyers were really professional in their conduct and understood my needs immediately to process my victims of crime compensation claim, which is why I have decided to share them with my readers. Iâ€™m sharing this personal and traumatic experience I suffered in hopes that it will bring to light that you always have options and are never alone in any kind of abuse. I was living in constant fear that my partner might be able to track me down and continue to abuse me, and I had also gotten to a point where I had feared the worst; death. My lawyer was highly professional and had years of expertise within the field which made me feel much more secure while dealing with this difficult situations.
Crime Victims Lawyers was with me each step of the way with their knowledge and understanding. I urge anyone who is going through domestic abuse or anyone who is a direct victim of crime of any sort, know anyone who is a victim of crime or is experiencing hardship as a result of crime being inflicted to come forward and share it with someone. When you reach out for any kind of help, it can lead to many positive options that can finally put an end to your silent battle with domestic abuse. You donâ€™t have to go through this alone.